* – how do I get this job? I was MADE for this job!!!:
* – scary. Innovative and cool, but kinda scary…
* – is the next Star Wars film gonna take place in an old folks home?
* – Steven Seagal and Sheriff Joe Arpaio? There’s an interesting combo!
* – I always liked Bruce Willis…
* – RIP, Harry Reems.
* – RIP, Bonnie Franklin.
* – RIP, Alan Calhamer.
* – RIP, C. Everett Koop.
* – DAMN!!! This is one hell of a smart kid!
* – thank you, Dr. Carson, sir. Thank you very much:
And just who is Dr. Carson? Well…
* – as long as we’re talking about Dr. Carson and his stance on political correctness…
pickles? Don’t go there.
how about the school in MA. that banned Valentine’s Day?
and we can’t have patriotic students. Oh, no!
don’t even think about bringing a gun to school.
don’t think about disarming another student, either.
now the SI swimsuit issue is racist. Seriously.
* – kinda makes me wanna go back sixty years or so…
* – go, Adam Carolla, go!
* – yeah, I’ll definitely be paying attention to what’s being taught in my son’s school.
* – I’m definitely keeping an eye on Rand Paul.
* – I am so glad I don’t live in New York City.
* – fuck you, Nanny Bloomberg. That’s all you’re worth – just a plain, simple “Fuck you!”
* – I bet Nanny Bloomberg does like Milton Tingling very much.
* – you know, when even Democrats are saying at least parts of Obamacare are bad…
* – death panels? What death panels? Well, according to Paul Krugman…
* – just how accurate was the SotU speech?
* – thank you, Senator Cruz:
* – thank you again, Senator Cruz:
Oh, and by the way, Senator Feinstein, I don’t give a damn how long you’ve been doing your job, or how close you’ve been to the Constitution. I give a damn how well you do the job and how well you understand the Constitution, and I have serious doubts about the both.
* – Benghazi? What Benghazi? Who is this Ben Ghazi person you speak of? Never heard of him…
* – according to Leon Panetta, President Obama apparently has no clue about Benghazi…
* – So it’s ok if Obama does the same stuff Bush did?
I don’t really need to say anything else, do I?
(I hope whoever bought her didn’t pay very much…)
* – now this is some scary shit! This is the USDA, people!
* – Marc Lamont Hill of CNN is an idiot.
* – CNN doesn’t exactly hire the brightest bulbs in the closet, do they?
* – global warming is the cause of asteroids, CNN? Really?!
* – NBC deceptively editing?! No way!
* – why don’t we hear more about clean coal?
* – as long as we’re on the climate change schtick: hot girl / conservative monologue.
* – and speaking of that hypocritical windbag Al Gore and his fans…
* – Dear Mexico,
Love and kisses,
* – gun rights:
* – hey, I’m just a guy. I’m the one with the dick between my legs, so what the hell do I know about how women want to protect themselves, right? So, you tell me, ladies, would you rather have a gun – you do trust yourself with a gun, don’t you? – to defend yourself with, or a pen? Or, why even defend yourself at all? Why not just piss yourself? Or puke all over yourself? Or just tell your would-be attacker you’re on the rag?
* – no matter what, ladies, just please tell me you won’t listen to Joe Biden!
* – “But you don’t need assault weapons or large capacity magazines!”
Yeah? Well, you don’t need…
* – you know the idea of higher taxes are bad when even Bill Maher starts complaining about it.
* – so, we’re basically auctioning access to the President now?
I guess that’s one way to combat the effects of the sequestration, huh?
* – this is an MSNBC personality, folks:
* – occasionally John Boehner says something I like:
* – speaking of sequestration, maybe if we just collected the back taxes that all those federal employees owed…
* – or maybe if the DHS wasn’t buying over a billion rounds of ammo and armored vehicles. Why does the DHS need armored vehicles?
* – 170 million jobs could be lost due to sequestration, Maxine Waters? 170 million? Really? You’re aware that there aren’t that many jobs in the country, right?
Here’s what it boils down to, Ms. Waters – you’re either stupid or a liar. Which one is it?
My money is on both, actually…
* – well done, Congressman Harris!
* – about that minimum wage…
* – more about that minimum wage.
* – because I just can’t get enough Bill Whittle…
* – well said, sir, VERY well said!
* – let’s end with some humor, shall we?: