Posted by: nhfalcon | March 18, 2008

For Your Viewing Pleasure…

Movies I’m willing to bet few – if any – of you remember or have ever heard of before.

We all have a list like this somewhere in our heads, don’t we? Movies we absolutely love that we tell people about and they look at us blankly and go, “Huh? Never heard of it.” Well, here are mine:

AlwaysRichard Dreyfuss, Holly Hunter, and John Goodman are firefighter pilots in this movie that turns into a chick flick by the end, but is hilariously funny at the beginning

Animalympics a GREAT movie for kids – and, yes, I still enjoy it as an “adult.” The animal kindom holds it own Olympics. A goold, old-fashioned animated flick featuring the voices of Billy Crystal and the late Gilda Radner.

Attack Force Z a WWII Aussie commandos vs. the Japanese war yarn starring a very young Mel Gibson amd Sam Neill.

Bachelor Partythe movie Tom Hanks never seems to get asked about whenever he’s on Inside The Actor’s Studio or shows like that. A typical 1980’s T&A comedy that also starred Adrian Zmed and Tawny Kitaen.

Better Off Deadah, the good ol’ days when John Cusack made funny movies…

Black Rain Michael Douglas and Andy Garcia (a tremendously underrated actor, imho. I’ll never understand why he didn’t become a megastar) as American cops in Japan taking on a renegade Yakuza. 

Brainsmasher Andrew Dice Clay plays a bouncer who’s trying to save a swimsuit model (Teri Hatcher) from evil Shao-lin (“We are NOT ninjas!”) monks who think she has the key to the Ultimate Power.

Cannonball Run one of Burt Reynolds’ best, funniest car chase movies.

Down PeriscopeKelsey Grammer as the captain of a submarine full of misfits. Very funny.

Dragnetonce upon a time Tom Hanks made funny movies.

The Final Optiona British action film (they call it Who Dares Wins across The Pond) loosely based on the hostage crisis of 1980 at the  Iranian Embassy in London.

The Golden ChildEddie Murphy is The Chosen One who can save the world.

Heartbreak Ridgeone of Clint Eastwood’s most entertaining movies, though who would’ve thought Hollywood would’ve chosen the American attack on Grenada as good storytelling!

Heart ConditionDenzel Washington is the ghost of a lawyer that Bob Hoskins’ cop couldn’t stand when he was alive. Denzel’s hanging around with Bob because when Bob needs a heart transplant, he gets Denzel’s heart!

Hudson Hawkcritics LOATHED this movie, calling it one of the biggest turkeys ever. I for the life of me cannot understand why. I LOVE this movie! Bruce Willis plays the title character, a cat burglar just out of prison.

If You Could See What I HearMarc Singer as blind musician Tom Sullivan.

Kill And Kill Againa martial arts flick so bad it’s good.

LassiterTome Selleck as an American cat burglar framed into stealing German diamonds for the British before WWII breaks out.

Lone Wolf McQuadeChuck Norris vs David Carradine! (sorry, but I couldn’t resist the cheesy music in the vidclip 🙂 )

LoverboyPatrick Dempsey as a teenage giggolo (sp?) long before he was a tv heartthrob on “Grey’s Anatomy.”

Major Leaguehow many stars are in the baseball comedy, anyway?! Charlie Sheen, Tom Berenger, Corbin Bersen, Wesley Snipes, Dennis Haysbert, and Rene Russo, for starters!

My Fellow Americans – James Garner and Jack Lemmon as ex-presidents who hate each other but are forced to work together to unmask a conspiracy. Funny!

Once Bittena very young Jim Carrey as a high schooler who, of course, wants to get laid, not only because he’s a guy, but also because there’s a female vampire in the neighborhood (Lauren Hutton) who only sucks the, um, blood of virgins!

One Crazy Summer – another one when John Cusack was funny.

The Presidio – Mark Harmon, Sean Connery, and Meg Ryan (back when she was HOT!) in a police thriller.

Quigley Down UnderTom Selleck is a sharpshooter hired by Alan Rickman in this western set in Australia.

Real GeniusVal Kilmer as a college student science wunderkind battling his professor and the U. S. military.

Ski School what were you expecting here, Oscar-caliber material?

Stakeout – a great buddy cop flick with Richard Dreyfuss and Emilio Estevez

Uncommon Valorfar and away the best movie ever made with the “Let’s rescue the POW / MIA’s from Vietnam” theme. Light-years ahead of Rambo and Missing In Action. Starring Gene Hackman and a very young Patrick Swayze.

Welcome Home, Roxy CarmichaelWinona Ryder and Jeff Daniels in a quirky little comedy / teen drama.

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Responses

  1. I would know what you’re talking about if you talked to me about 22 of these movies. Varying degrees of knowing, though. Let’s recap:

    Always – Know it, cry about it, think of it when I see Holly Hunter. Do not understand why people rerun Once Around instead of this when they want Hunter and Dreyfuss together.

    Bachelor Party – Know it exists, would have recognized it as a Hanks movie, never saw it.

    Better Off Dead & One Crazy Summer – I have seen more times than it strictly healthy. “I want my two dollars” and those poor lobsters in the pool. Why did everyone see Cusack and “Animation!”

    Black Rain – I’ve seen parts of it on TV, I remember when it came out, I always mix it up with the Sean Connery-Wesley Snipes movie.

    Canonball Run – Exactly who do you hang out with that doesn’t recognize this movie? That’s criminal! And why this movie and not Smokey & The Bandit?

    Dragnet – I’ve never seen it so I won’t make fun of it but I’ll say that I haven’t seen it because even the poster didn’t look funny to me when it came out.

    The Golden Child – I remember where and with whom I saw it. It was the first bad movie an ex and I ever went to see and he was crushed because we’d had such good movie karma up to then.

    Heartbreak Ridge – I can identify almost all Clint movies I’ve just never seen them.

    Hudson Hawk – I believed the critics but I’ve seen parts on TV.

    Lassiter – I know it exists and that Tom Sellek was in it.

    Loverboy – Of course I know this and any good Grey’s fan should familiarize herself with it. Not as good as Can’t Buy Me Love, though. To be clear, I knew about this WAY before Grey’s was even an idea going into a pitch meeting.

    Major League – Not as good as Eight Men Out and I’ve never seen it but I would recognize it easily.

    My Fellow Americans & Once Bitten – Knew they existed.

    The Presidio – Saw it in the theatre. Had an aha moment soon after when a friend joined the service and his address included The Presidio.

    Real Genius – (“Are you Chris Knight?” “I hope so, I’m wearing his underwear.”) (“Can you hammer a 6 inch nail through a board with your penis?” “No.” “Oh well, a girl’s got to have her standards.”) You could say I know this movie but it would be such an understatement.

    Ski School – It exists.

    Stakeout – It exists and why didn’t Emilio become a director sooner?

    Uncommon Valor – knew it existed, knew the genre, couldn’t have told you anything else about it.

    Welcome Home…. – Try as I may I can’t get all the way through this one. Vintage Winona, though. The good old days.

    You need to hang around with different people if no one knows these movies. 🙂

  2. Apparently I just need to hang around with you, Kizz. When are you coming up to visit Mrs. Chili again? 🙂

  3. DAMN, Boy! You could have spit this up into a couple of weeks’ worth of Ten Things Tuesdays!

    Okay, you obviously didn’t consult with ME before you claimed that people look at you blankly. Exactly WHICH people are you talking about?

    I’ve seen 22 of those movies, too. As a matter of God’s honest fact, Mr. Chili and I were JUST talking about one of them this weekend.

    See if you can guess which ones I’ve seen and I’ll tell you if you’re right. Oh, and I’m taking Major League off your guess-list, because we saw that one together (Fuck you, Jobu. I do it myself!)

  4. OK, my friends have seen most of these films, I’m sure, but that’s part of the reason why they’re my friends – they have similar tastes to mine. Pull some average Joe off the street, though and ask him if he’s ever seen “My Fellow Americans” and I’m sure he’ll go “My Fellow who?”

    Mrs. C., I’ll use the process of elimination here and list the movies I’m sure you HAVEN’T seen:

    “Animalympics”
    “Attack Force Z”
    “Brainsmasher”
    “The Final Option”
    “If You Could See What I Hear”
    “Kill and Kill Again”
    “Once Bitten”
    “Ski School”
    “Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael”

    How’d I do?

  5. I remember “Always,” mostly for that great scene near the beginning when the plane is scooping up water and flying towards some little boat. Cool.

    I saw “Black Rain,” eminently forgettable.

    “The Golden Child” I also recall, I don’t know how this pot-boiler made it to theaters.

    “Presidio” was entertining.

    “Quigley Down Under” I’ve seen on TV more than once. If I happen to catch it, I am unable to stop watching it. Hmm.

    “Heartbreak Ridge.” Saw it on TV.

    “If You Could See What I Hear.” Never saw it, but I saw Tom Sullivan perfom live once and he was terrific. He also sang the National Anthem at some football game and just freaking nailed it!

    I saw “Stakeout” on the teevee.

    Saw “Hudson Hawk” on the teevee. I agree with the critics. To steal a line from a critic reviewing “Passenger 57,” I had a bad seat, it was facing the screen.
    I’ve seen snippets of some of the others on TV, but could not get interested enough to watch more.

  6. Ooooh! I forgot one. “The Pusuit of D. B. Cooper” starring Treat Williams and Robert Duvall. How many of you have ever seen THAT one?!

  7. You got all of them but “if you could see what I hear.” The scene where the blind guy is driving the car, gets pulled over, then explains to the cop that he’s driving because the sighted guy is too drunk is one of my all-time favorites.


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