Posted by: nhfalcon | January 6, 2008

Grocery Store Randomness

* – if you can’t figure out how to park your big-ass SUV, you shouldn’t be allowed to own your big-ass SUV!

* – hey, jackass, this is a grocery store parking lot, not the Indy 500. Lighten up on the accelerator, ok, Andretti?

* – check these out! Skip the intro and click on the “Six Outrageous Flavors” link. I’ll give three guesses as to the flavor I’m trying to direct your attention to, and the first two don’t count. Is it just me, or is anybody else uncomfortable with a NUT snack called “Nudies?”

* – I’ve already established by now that I’m your typical male pig, right? OK, then you’ll understand why I chuckle anytime I see a product touting itself as “sweet and salty.” Yeah, I got something “sweet and salty” for ya right here, baby! 🙂

* – Wine companies certainly come up with some interesting names for themselves, don’t they? The one that caught my eye on the family’s latest trip was called “Three Blind Moose.” Who comes up with this stuff?!

* – lastly, while we’re talking about bad names for products, who decided “Prego” would be a good name for spaghetti sauce? What’s the stuff made with, afterbirth?



  1. OK, you’ve just ruined the only spaghetti sauce that I actually like.

    And, I like it just as well as the next girl and better than most but there’s nothing sweet about it, I don’t care how much pineapple juice you drank beforehand.

  2. Does anybody really eat that Prego crap? I’d rather put ketchup on my pasta (and I don’t like ketchup much) (well, pasta either, really).

    Sometimes in grocery store parking lots, in fine weather, with almost no cars there, people park right in front of the door of the store (usually where the little ramp thingy is for carts), because, they figure, they are only “running in for a couple of items.” Assholes.

    My dear mother was a “herd instinct” driver at the grocery and other large parking lots. If there were only 2 cars alreay parked in the vast lot, and they left one space between them, guess where she’d park?

    Laugh if you will, but, as a kid, I loved to spread chocolate fudge sauce on saltines. Yummy.

  3. Oh, I forgot, the cute wine names.

    Way back “in the day” us young stupid lovers of hot cars had a saying: “If it won’t run, chrome it.” I’ve sipped a lot of those cute name wines (well, I’ve sipped a lot of wine generally), and most of them are crap. Swill. Rotgut. Panther Piss.

    And don’t get me started on stupid names for bands. Now even individuals performing solo are going for these idiotic names. A guy who performs pretty well (and I refuse to use his name because he doesn’t), puts out records where the artist is shown as “Iron and Wine.” Hey, as Frank Zappa said: Shut up and play yer guitar!

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